A divorce is a stressful experience for both parties, and tensions can often run high. However, it is the time to think calmly and make the right decisions regarding vital issues such as child custody, property division, alimony, and child support. Getting involved in emotional conflict with your soon-to-be-ex can only distract you from your goals and may even make the divorce proceedings more prolonged and contentious.
It is best to have an experienced divorce and family law attorney on your side who can give you the right legal advice at every step and help you navigate judiciously through this difficult phase of life. Well-trodden divorce lawyers recommend a number of ways that will pave the way for a faster and less challenging divorce. Here are some of the top mistakes you should consciously steer clear of while you are going through a divorce in California.
A divorce is already a painful and scary situation for your children. Do not worsen matters by putting them in an emotional bind and asking them to choose one side or the other. Remember that your divorce is not your children’s fault and they may not share the same negative feelings against your ex-spouse who is their parent. However, if your former spouse has a history of domestic violence or abuse, you might have to take steps to protect yourself and your children.
While you are anxious to get rid of your ex-spouse and bring closure to this situation, it does not mean you should give up your financial rights. Matters such as property division, spousal support, and child support need your time and focus if you want to obtain what is rightfully yours. You also need to consider the tax implications of each financial choice you make.
Go by your attorney’s advice in these matters, and acquire all possible financial information about the income, assets, and debts belonging to both you and your ex-spouse. A meticulous approach to determining the real financial position will help you get your rightful share, and make your future more secure.
A divorce is not the time to trust your ex-spouse’s word regarding sensitive issues such as child custody and visitation, spousal support, and division of assets. Do not make the mistake of entering into any arrangements that are not backed by a written agreement or documentation.
Regardless of how nicely and reassuringly the other party is behaving on these issues, you cannot rule of the possibility that after divorce their attitude may be completely different. You don’t want any agreement that cannot be proved and can be easily contested in a court of law. Make sure your attorney is present during any critical arrangements or agreements you enter into with your former spouse.
No matter how self-sufficient and strong you believe you are, a divorce can still drain you out emotionally. It is the time to enlist the support of your family and friends, and not shut out yourself from the people who love you. Support from loved ones can prove to be invaluable in this difficult time.
Some of your loyal friends and acquaintances may be common between you and your ex-spouse. Do not hold it against them if they continue to maintain relations with both of you. But continue to be discreet about what information about your personal situation and your divorce proceedings you want to share with someone who knows both you and your ex.
Although friends and family can provide solid emotional support during your divorce, they cannot give you legal advice. You need to have a capable and trusted divorce attorney on your side that will guide you through the complexities of your divorce. But your attorney can help you only when they know all the facts and information that could be relevant to your case.
Your lawyer will maintain attorney-client confidentiality and you can trust them to provide you the right advice. Do not withhold information from them, and discuss your goals, concerns, and facts in the most frank manner with them. But the pre-requisite is to hire a reputable California divorce attorney who not only has the knowledge of law but also the experience to provide the best counsel in sensitive divorce and family law matters.